when it rains

"When it rains, I don't mind being lonely.
I cry right along with the sky.
When it rains, I don't pretend to be happy.
I don't even have to try.
when it rains, some people get down to sportin' a frown.
So I fit right in.
Yeah the sun may brighten your day but if I had my way I'd take the rain."
(Unsure about this part. I have a tendency to walk around looking sad, unfortunately, even when I'm honestly not. That's just my thinking face. )

"Start out depressed, everything comes as a pleasant surprise."
(But this is wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong. What should be pleasant surprises get diminished, and it takes really big things to snap you out of it. Although, the reversal really feels spectacular sometimes.)

Despite the depressing lyrics, I do feel better lately. I'm losing the weight I gained from a few weekends of late-night snacking/panic eating, I did well on the 8.012 exam, I'm catching up with 18.03 and I expect to do fine. Pass/fail really is a godsend. The only class that makes me panic is my Hass- I really hate humanities classes. The subject matter is interesting, but something about writing papers is sheer torture. Next term, since it's graded and I want/will take advantage of sophomore standing if I have the chance, I'll take economics instead. Applied math/psych for humanities credit- what a lovely thing. I'd rather stay up all night doing a pset than writing research papers. I'd love to take a creative writing class or a philosophy class though.

Oh, my laptop broke. Also, it's 5 AM. Should I do my physics pset, or should I leave it for tomorrow? I should probably do it now. It's funny- I've worked for 10+ hours on a 10 minute presentation, panicking, but the thought of working so much longer on physics doesn't bother me at all.

I wish I were smart enough to major in physics. I am seriously considering bioengineering and electrical engineering, though.

Something optimistic: I looked in the mirror and thought my glasses made me look cute.

The writing on this blog is spectacularly shitty and meandering. I'll try and post something better next time, just to practice my writing skills and make sure they don't get too rusty. Personal thoughts are hard to organize, unfortunately.